Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Squirt.

I've started squirting during sex.  The last two times Rowdy and I have gone at it, I've soaked the bed.  I don't know what changed, since we weren't doing any activities we hadn't done before; maybe my body just decided it was squirtin' time. Maybe it's like riding a squirty bike, and now that I've done it once I'll always be able to.

The disappointing news is: it's not a mega ultra orgasm.  I wish I could describe for you about how it's an intensely spiritual and powerfully erotic whatever whatever, but at least for me, it's really not.  It's like a regular orgasm and then there's a puddle.  The sex afterwards can be extra fun because it's super wet and slippery and messy, but the squirting itself doesn't feel like anything different.

The one thing that bothers me is that I find myself having tremendous anxiety over whether it's pee.  It can't be pee, I keep saying. There have been studies and stuff, right?  No way did I just uncontrollably pee on his dick during sex.

The problem is... even if it's not all pee, I can't really convince myself that it's 100% pee-free.  It's coming out of my urethra, presumably out of my bladder, and, let's face it, that's a pretty pee-intensive area.  What I can believe is: so what if it's pee?

Bodies are messy things.  We're sixty percent water, and zero percent of that is water in its nice cool clear form; it's blood and lymph, chyme and mucus.  People are made of goo, and to express love of the physical human body is to glory in goo.  We don't just tolerate but take joy in the ooze and gush of saliva, of sweat, of semen, of vaginal fluids.  What's one more flavor of goo?  Why is it acceptable to me that I produce this gooey human fluid and not that one?

It'd be interesting, in a sort of "huh, did you know opossums had forked penises" way, to know whether my squirts are pee or not.  But I'm not pinning my ego on the answer.  I can take pride in "I came so hard that I peed!" as well.

56 comments:

  1. Here's how you tell! My sex expert columnist friend, Danielle de Santiago, wrote an article on this in Germany.

    Pee is bitter, G-spot ejaculate tastes sweet as it has sugars in it. So all you have to do is have a little taste :)

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    1. More salty then bitter. It tastes like the smell plus salt.-if you drink much its very subtle. So dip your finger in in a second and smell.
      Or eat a bunch of onion or asparagus, if its pee you WILL smell it.
      I tried golden shower once. Not my cup of tea-wasnt bad or such but wasnt great eather-very meh-ish.

      Maybe-if you want you can try to untrain that. Its pee after all-water with minerals and urea-and almost sterile after it cqme out( unless you got an infection- but thats something you'd have noticed)
      So. I have more problems with poop( so thats ONE reason i dont like anal that much- okay thats wrong-anal is my kink and iblove porn with that in it, but poop+ irritatable bowel syndrome = shitty anal(what a wortwitz..)

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  2. The fluid originates in a gland that's the female analogue to the prostate. I have found that since my accidental discovery of this talent years ago, I can make the stream of fluid stronger by engaging the pelvic floor muscles while stimulating the clitoris. Sometimes it's just a dribble, and sometimes it's a serious firehose of a gush that leaves my legs shaking and my head spinning. My sub really enjoys being marked by my fluids in this fashion.

    Enjoy!

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  3. I do this, too. And have only very, very recently become kind-of-okay with it.

    The first few times it happened, I was mortified. For a few months, I was even terrified of masturbating anywhere but the shower for fear that I would uncontrollably pee all over everything.

    But since then, I've become convinced that it isn't entirely urine (or maybe not at all). I don't squirt every time I orgasm--maybe about 10-25% of the time (but I can't control when/if it happens). I've also noticed that they're different kinds of orgasms, too--not super intense, mind-numbing ones, but the wave-slowly-washes-over-me relaxing ones.

    The thing is, even if I've gone to the bathroom recently before sex/masturbation, sometimes it STILL happens, even though I am pretty sure I am totally out of pee. So I am not entirely convinced of the high-urine-content theory. For now I'm just comfortable with the idea that it's just a "weird thing our bodies do" fluid, pee-content aside.

    This was really interesting, and I feel less strange now for hearing about it from someone else! I'd be really interested in hearing about other people's experiences too, since I was always under the impression that female ejaculation was kind of rare.

    Cheers,
    Dahlia

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    1. I've also peed right before masturbating, and it doesn't kill the squirting, so it's gotta be coming from somewhere else.

      I used to always squirt, then I stopped, and now I've started again...can't say I'm pleased, but my boyfriend is really into it, so at least it's making someone happy.

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  4. I've done a lot of first hand research on the topic (AND an enormous amount of laundry), and in my opinion, female ejaculate contains SOME pee. As in, a little bit, not enough to worry about.

    Also, similar to men, prolonged arousal without climax increases the volume of ejaculate.

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  5. Once I squirted once or twice, it became something that I could do all the time. Now I can usually do it if I try hard enough, too. But like you, it's not a crazy orgasm. I soak the bed and squirt absolutely everywhere and it feels GOOD, but it's not like the mind blowing clitoral orgasms that I have.

    So yeah, you're not weird!

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  6. My experience is that I squirt even with a totally empty bladder, and that the stuff which comes out is clear and odorless (unlike pee, which is yellow and... pee smelling).
    Sometimes I don't squirt at all, sometimes I squirt a little (usually from sex), sometimes I squirt a lot(usually from my hand).
    Shrug.
    To be honest, I don't think it's that big of a deal. I think it has more to do with the angle of penetration than how awesome my orgasm is.

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  7. Rosie: Yeah, I was going to say, we can be pretty sure it's not pee. Sure, it might have some pee in it, but does anyone ever squirt entirely yellow, pee-smelling stuff?

    ...That was an awkward sentence.

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  8. I am totally baffled by squirting. I think I've done it a couple times, but I only specifically remember one time, and I only knew it had happened because the guy I was fooling around with had a completely wet face. There was nothing different about the orgasm. It didn't occur to me that it might have been pee until I was telling a friend about it and she mentioned out of nowhere that she had heard that it wasn't pee. I'm not going to worry either way, since I have no way of controlling it or even knowing if it's going to happen. Also, I agree that "I came so hard I peed" is something to be proud of.

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  9. I'm not a squirter, but I've been reading about it (blah blah blah special reservoir blah blah Skene's glands blah blah ejaculate blah) and now I'm obsessively wondering whether I have twenty years' worth of ejaculate stored up, or what. Like...where does unspent girl-juice go? Shouldn't I at least feel some kind of pressure from it building up, or something?

    This kind of stuff freaks me out.

    And to squirters who feel self-conscious about their ejaculate even coming out the same tube as their pee, like it's vaguely unsanitary or something...let me just remind you that DUDES COME THROUGH THEIR URETHRAS TOO. So, pretty much par for the course.

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  10. I had only squirted a couple of times in 16 years of alot of partners... but there's something about my current partner, angle, length, I don't know, but I squirt ALOT with him. Like as many times in the past two months as I have in my life EVER. I do find it's a different orgasm - more pervasive in my whole pelvis, versus just clit. Warm & fuzzy feeling, longer buildup, pretty fantastically yummy. And really not pee. But it feels so good, I wouldn't care if it were.

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  11. okay this is probably not the precise forum in which to pose this question to others, but...

    sometimes i'll just be goin' about my day and then all of a sudden TINY RUSH OF SQUIRT? like, as if one had let out a short burst of in-their-pants pee, except the panties inevitably look like i just came in them, so def not urine, but also way different than just vaginal discharge. like, we're talking intense, shotgunned-several-beers-pee feeling in my lady-bits. it is totally unrelated to sexual arousal though it does happen more frequently if i've masturbated or had sex the night before.

    is this just me? what gives?

    anyway this is still relevant in that i used to be super freaked out about it, much as i used to refuse to touch my vulva while aroused (having a handheld shower as a teenager made it easy to be repressed about the mechanics of sex), but i've gotten more chill about it as i got more involved in kinky/sex positive thought. it's a thing my body does! how cool!

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  12. Anon - Hm I'm going to go with "yep, it's a thing your body does." Different people definitely have very different quantities and types of daily.. lubrication?... so maybe yours just has unusual timing as well.

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  13. If it is pee or a little bit pee, it might make you feel better to know it's sterile.

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  14. Anon: I do this too. But then, I squirt a lot during sex anyway. I think it's just a pipes-cleaning thing, like how male bodies get random erections during the day sometimes.

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  15. Doesn't male ejaculate also contain some pee, or did I just make that up? But like...only a little. So...no biggie?

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  16. The one and only time I squirted was my very first orgasm. I thought it was pee (and didnt figure out otherwise for a decade) and supressed the reaction afterwards as a result.

    My current girlfriend is a prolific and consistent squirter. And I promise it neither smells nor tastes like pee. As for a potential minor urine content because it comes out of the same hole... since I don't freak out about this when I blow a guy I refuse to make a bigger deal out of it when it's a woman.

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  17. My girlfriend squirts, even though she says she didn't with her ex husband. At first, I was a little freaked out by it, and I have to admit there are practical implications (like, you can NOT just go to sleep after...the wet spot isn't just something you can avoid...it's time to change the sheets. Again.) However, it also makes me proud to know she is getting off because of something I did.

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  18. I'm *almost* certain that I ejaculate, but that it goes back up into my bladder instead of squirting out. Sometimes after great sex I have to pee like whoa, even though I went beforehand. And then it's very clear, un-pee-smelling fluid.

    I already knew I had a few wires crossed, so I'm not too surprised if my plumbing is a bit tangled as well!

    flightless

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  19. I'm the same as that anon, as I squirt when I'm just "lounging" around the house (disability yay). I enjoy it, as it makes masturbating far easier than when I'm irritatingly dry and my finger gets pruny from the licking, but still quite confusing.

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  20. My partner also squirts, which is something she never did until we'd had sex a few times. Maybe your theory about "unlocking" it somehow is on the right track! It's been hard for me to wrap my brain around the "Yeah, I squirted, but that doesn't mean it was especially great" concept, because as a male when *I* squirt, it *was* especially great at that moment. Took a while to internalize that one.

    Still significant to me when she squirts, though. It's physical evidence of orgasm, more certain than moan patterns, an exclamation point on the sentence of sex, and it doesn't happen any other time. It's neat!

    And, even if it is pee? Still feels like a precious gift she gives specifically to me. First time she gushed it was during cunnilingus, and I drank every drop because no matter what the fluid was, it was *special* that she gave it to me.

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  21. As I once said to a girlfriend who was embarrassed that she'd just squirted all over the sheets: "Don't worry, the Australian government is pretty sure that didn't just happen."

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  22. Priam - Awww, that's sweet. :)

    ...Rowdy, I made you a present!

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  23. There definitely are differences. The smell, for one. I don't want a piss-soaked mattress.

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  24. When my wife squirts it is always a) from a very intense orgasm b) is brought about by very deep sex (cervix pounding) and c) from what my cock can tell, issues forth from within her cervix in a forcefull flood That becomes a gushing torrent. It is thinner than vaginal mucus but has a strong, decidedly musky and earthy smell of feminine arousal. Squirting is most common after deep insertion, multiple finger to half hand fingering and almost always occurs in some variation of missionary position.

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  25. Just an idea, but could your squirting not be the consequence of a bodily function changing, but the level of intimacy and emotion increasing in your relationship with Rowdy? Also, you two know each other's preferences and bodies better now than when you met.

    I just think that maybe it's all not just about the body, but the mind as well. My squirting went away for a long while, when I had a rough time emotionally, and now it's back, and I've equated that with being more happy and content with my life and my kinks.

    I used to have that "Omg did I just pee" moment and it wasn't nice or helping me have incredible sex, so I finally let it go. If you really want to know, just smell it. You'd smell, if it was pee. (I've talked about the smell of female ejaculate here before, I think.) That's the easiest way to find out, if you don't want to taste it or take it to the lab. I'm also with Pervercecowgirl on this one - men's semen probably has traces of pee too and we never chastise them for it.

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  26. The idea that women who have never squirted before in their lives can suddenly become squirters pleases me immensely! The spice must flow!

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  27. I feel sorry for women who won't enjoy sex or learn about their bodies. I understand some have been abused or raised improperly, or believe in Judeo-Christian values that harm their happiness, but the truth is out there if you want to find it. You can change your life. You can be happy. Will you let yourself? http://tinyurl.com/l42d96

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  28. I'm another person who is glad to see someone saying 'yeah, I squirt, but that doesn't make the orgasms super especially awesome'. Usually when it happens to me I don't even notice unless it drips down my fingers or all over the bed under me or everything suddenly feels slipperier - though I do like seeing it all over my partner's face. I have had some shaking orgasms that have caused it, but they're in the minority compared to 'oh, it happened again' types.

    TJ_Rowe

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  29. Anon 1:55 - I don't think I need your pity for my terrible sex life, thanks.

    (To others: The link goes to a "let me Google for that you" of "female ejaculation." On which the top link is the Wiki article I link in this post. In case we don't know, I guess.)

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  30. My girlfriend squirts. I didn't know a. that she did or b. what I would think if I were ever with someone who did.
    Wow. That's about all I can say. Oh, and that it's sweet. Not honey sweet, but there's a sweet tinge to it. And I love making her cum on me. No question.

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  31. I must say, my wife was more surprised than I when it happened to her the first time. After that, we always have a towel ready. That wet spot gets pretty cold at night since she had a tendancy to soak the mattress. As for pee? I'm not an expert, and as many before me have opinined, it sure doesn't smell or taste like pee. :)

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  32. Did anon 1:55 just accuse Holly of being sexually inhibited and ignorant (possibly because of being too darned religious)?

    BWAH HA HA HA HA HA

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  33. soaked mattresses mean time to invest in a couple of 3ft square waterproof underpads (sold as incontinence pads) that are washable fabric. Under or over the sheets, they protect the mattress and can be quickly pulled off, repositioned, replaced, or whatever needs to be done. And they are silent (not crackly). Mattresses, imo, are too expensive to soak.

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  34. Anon@7:47, I do the same thing. A few times throughout the day, I have a little rush or trickle of fluids that I can definitely feel. I think it's just the way my body does the whole secretion thing - maybe for other people it's more gradual and unnoticeable. Like you, it happens more for me when I've recently masturbated or had a bunch of sex, or, I notice, in the couple days before my period.

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  35. When I was much younger, my girlfriend at the time was sitting on my face and all of a sudden liquid poured all over me. I exclaimed, "Hey! Did you just pee on me!?" She was all like, "Dude, you are such a fucken dumshitte. Remind me why I even date you?" lolz

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  36. I actually don't enjoy ejaculating. Not because I think it's messy or embarrassing. The thing is, I can feel it building up, and it becomes uncomfortable if I let it build up for too long. This wouldn't be a problem if I wasn't incapable of ejaculating while my vagina is full. So sometimes I have to pause in the middle of sex for it. Which is annoying.

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    1. If you needed to pause and do that I would wait patiently! This would def not be a problem for me Nicole! Tim-LI

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  37. To the author, female ejaculate is speculated to exit via skene's glands. Tastes like lymph to me, so probably similar in constitution to blood plasma.
    It's apparently pretty hard to actually micturate whilst fully aroused, as the clitoris engorges with blood and essentially clamps off the urethra.
    And to one of the anonymous; urine is not sterile, nor is blood plasma.

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    1. Urine should be fucking sterile unless you have a UTI. ~A Nurse

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  38. First off, the more I read of your blog, the more awesome I thing you are!

    Second, I had a very similar experience. About 5 months after I started having sex with my current boyfriend, I started squirting. It is like a bike, for me anyway. Before it happened, despite my private efforts to squirt, nothing. Now, I occasionally can squirt all by my lonesome.

    Like you said, it isn't a more intense orgasm (if anything it's less intense), but I did note that it occurs after (a) lots of orgasms or stimulation or (b) g-spot stimulation.

    As for the "is it pee/does it have pee?" If you have a very full bladder, I've read that there can actually be pee in it (it does come out the same place...), but that is not what most of it is. As someone with a very small bladder, I have had occasions where it smelled a little like pee, but it was still clearly something different (in texture, appearance, and taste, as well as some difference smell)

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  39. I have only ever REALLY squirted once, with my current boyfriend. He had picked me up and we were fucking with him stood up and my legs wrapped around, and I didn't even know it had happened - he told me that we were suddenly awfully wet.
    Since then, I have "squirted" once, from masturbation, but although it was a lot of clear liquid, it did have a mild smell of pee... But then afterwards, I then went to the toilet and had a full wee, so I am so confused.
    And for me it has only ever happened when I have already come at least once, both when having sex and when masturbating.
    Odd...

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  40. I've been trying to learn how to squirt. I saw this other blog entry that talks about blood flow and stuff: http://womenwantporn.blogspot.com/2011/12/squirting.html

    But I think it's too hard for me to just really let go and squirt. I dunno.

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  41. So far I've found this conversation particularly interesting. I have been having sex for 12 years and only in the past couple of months have I started squirting regularly (pretty much every time I have sex). I have no idea what changed or what has been different enough to cause the change and I'm still not sure how I feel about it. Like many of you it's a pain to have to change the sheets but the guys I'm with seem to thoroughly enjoy the fact that they can make me squirt. I haven't had the heart to tell them that I'm squirting without an orgasm (which usually comes later and is a lot more intense). I've always been sexually adventurous and liked trying new things but this one has me stumped. Does anyone know if there's any way to stop this from happening? I read someone on here say it's like riding a bike, once you know how then you always will (I think that's a great analogy cause so far there's no stopping this downpour) And for the record IT'S NOT PEE! and it's not coming from the same place, the skene gland is far up inside the vagina near the cervix and the urethra is closer to the front of the vagina. Look up female anatomy and you'll see the difference. So no worries ladies it's definitely NOT PEE!

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  42. Been sleeping wit this girl for two months and the other night she squirted, from missionary, then while I was eating her out from behind(which almost drowned me literally) then doggy, then wit her on top! It was amazing first time fer both of us! Next timewhich was las nit she did it 3 times! This time I jumped down there when it was bout to happen, pulled her lil flower tight wit one hand and rubbed the other vigorously back and fourth over the entire thing, pretty forcefully! And she squirted to the ceiling almost, no exaggeration probably four cups worth! I'm pretty proud of myself and she seems to really like her new talent! My question which I know took along time to get to(bragging a lil if u didn't notice) is will she be able to do this with future partners! Or is it jus me? We are not serious and have talked about no commitments between us. Helped her develop this new talent, already jealous some guy is gonna be able enjoy what we discoverd together! Sure he gonna be jus as proud of himself as I am! And now that I'm.gettin this down think ill be able to unlock this in other women?

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    1. Women rarely contain unlockable achievements.

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  43. It's not pee. It's ejaculate, really, from the Skene's glands (female prostate) from near the urethral opening. You can smell it and it won't smell like pee. It can contain small amounts of urine because of the proximity of the glands to the urethra, but the major components of the substance are comparable to male ejaculate (prostate specific antigen, glucose, zinc--pretty much the whole everything you'd find in male cum except sperm).

    It's sad, really. We spent all this time in sex ed learning "these are the fallopian tubes" and "these are the fimbrae" and "this is the ovary" and "this is the uterus", but I never knew where my clitoris was, or what Skene's glands were, or what Bartholin's glands were until I found it out myself by checking a book out of my college library. We've known about these glands since 1672 and we don't even teach people about them.

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  44. I have made an exciting discovery!

    After reading about female ejaculation, I managed to do it a few times during masturbation. I haven't been able to do it when having sex with my partner. Him stimulating my skene's glands with his finger in the come hither way didn't help either.

    Anyway, I pee after between rounds of sex and after sex. I thought my urethra gets stimulated and hence the frequent pee. Today after masturbating, I went to pee and something told me to check the pee. It wasn't pee, it was ejaculate! And now I am thinking many women could release this ejaculate when they pee after sexual stimulation and don't know it. I urge people out there to check their 'urine' during and after sexual encounters. It could very well be ejaculate and not pee that you are leaving in the toilet.

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  45. I thought the same the first time I released that gush of water. L I can squirt ten times in a row with or without clitoral stimulation, I love it. It feels super intense must be different for everybody.

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  46. I've squirt for my first time last night and was pretty blown away! I didn't even notice it had happened till we were done. I guess my mind was just completely open and i'd just let go and had never came so hard. I think I was more shocked than my boyfriend (although he was pretty amazed). I have questions like, since i've done it once will this happen again or more often? I was slightly embarrassed right after but with his reaction and him saying he wished he could make me do that more often I felt better. I peed a lot after so I thought that big wet spot on the bed couldn't have been pee! and it didn't leave a pee stain lol. Making love to him is amazing every time and it just keeps getting better, so I guess we can only keep going up from here. But I think I'm sill just a little amazed and in shock. What the heck was that though? This page helped me to understand a little more so thank you for posting this! :)

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  47. If you want to know if it's urine or not just take Orzo Standard and if it comes out with color then it is urine.

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    1. I hope you mean Azo Standard?

      That wouldn't be 100% proof though, because it could color other body fluids.

      Anyway that'd be terrible to get out of the sheets.

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  48. i was using my smartballs today, and i kept wanting to feel shudders up my back, i went to the bathroom to pull the smartballs out, and slowely a stream of that white stuff came out involuntary!,, then by the time id pulled the smartballs out completely, more came out im a small blast.. dunno wat that was about.. im not a squirter n im sure iv only ever squirted once in my whole life... im 24ish.

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  49. I'm a squirter. First off, it is definately a real female sexual function. It enhances sex. When you do it, orgasm may be harder to reach but way more intense, if you squirt to much, orgasm may not be possible. Second, it is not urinary incontinence at all. Once you learn how to do it you also learn how to control it. Finally, it is not pee. When you pee, it has a horrible smell after about 30 minutes. Female ejaculation does not. There is probably some correlation to peeing, however, if the fluid comes from the bladder, it gets filtered by the prostate. If it were just a mere incontinence of urinary persuasion, then why is it that women control it and it enhances and lubricates sex and, btw, why do women squirt to get off? Urinary incontinence is involuntary and results in horrible fowl smelling pee. We all know female ejaculation is real but it is not at time of orgasm it happens before orgasm, more of a lubricating thing, and happens "on demand".

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  50. It is female ejaculate. Not pee at all. I squirt on a daily basis buckets of fluid. No exageration. I was abashed...feeling like I was not normal nd rhat my husband may be so tired of dealing witn such a mess. We had to get rid our mattresses after several flips over the years and finally thought of purchasing bed protectors. At times....I feel drained and dehydrated. While ejacuulating...I would feel such a huge releasing. It's very different than an orgasm. Orgasms are overwhelming sensations that will literally make you want your partner to climax and fall asleep. Ejaculate feels like your water broke in a way....I can literally feel stress & tension leave my body as I began to release. I have learned to embrace it, my hubby loves it (talk about a males ego) I know now how to position myself to release more as my well literally runs dry. It's amazing what our bodies can do. Before taking a sexy shower with my husband I'll use the bathroom where I would see light yellow urine. The color on our sheets and bed protector did not change at all while having sex. It looks like someone spilled a large glass of water on the bed. Different smell, different fluid leaving the body. It's normal. Enjoy your sex life.

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