Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Guinea Pig Hump.

I have two guinea pigs. (They are CUTE little FUZZIES and I LOVE them. Just FYI.) Sometimes they hump. This bothers me a bit, partly because they're sisters, and mostly because the one being humped generally doesn't like it. The humpee doesn't panic or anything, it's clearly not a major violation, but she's annoyed. She'll make angry noises and she'll wiggle out from under.

And somehow it offends my sexual mores that they insist on acting like the humper is the "winner" and the humpee is the "loser." I never see a piggy happily offering herself for humping. (I often see them humping each other from the wrong end, but to be fair, both ends of a guinea pig do look pretty similar.) They're both female, yet they see the male role as desirable, as the one that brings dominance and/or pleasure.

I shall have to print them very tiny Gloria Steinem books.

13 comments:

  1. either that or get out more :)

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  2. You do realize that that behavior is used by many pack animals to establish place within the pack, right? So if A humps be, then A outranks B within the pack.

    OK, I thought you did, but was just checking...

    :)

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  3. Mithras61 - Obviously, yeah, but it makes me wonder why. In the absence of ability to actually impregnate each other, why is "I FUCK YOU LIKE A MAN" a statement of dominance?

    Or maybe I'm overanalyzing and the guinea pig on top gets some physical stimulation that the guinea pig on bottom doesn't.

    Shit, I do need to get out more.

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  4. They obviously need a male sub.

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  5. The last line of your post was the funniest thing I've read all week.

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  6. It ain't just dogs or guinea pigs, you'll see this behavior across a huge range of social mammals, and for a whole lot of different reasons; aside from dominance, it can also be regular play, an attention-getting device, or just plain physical contact.

    Rather more rarely, it's about sex. ;)

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  7. Oh, unrelated- this article damn near made my head explode. I have no idea if I'll have the time and organized brain capacity to fisk it, but you might like to...

    Dwindling Alpha Males

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  8. I'm sure our friend Twisty Faster would have posted a blog entry blaming the patriarchy for this. And she would have gotten 100 comments agreeing with her.

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  9. In the post-class society, all guinea pigs will be required to offer themselves for hot dry-humping rodent action a minimum of three times per week.

    Also, don't guinea pigs have brains about this >.< big? You might want to start with tiny pamphlets.

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  10. >.<

    Yeah, that's about the face they make.

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  11. My parents' cats, brother and sister, curl up in what can only be described as a 69 position. My sister's seen it too, so I know I'm not crazy. I don't know how widespread oral sex is across the animal kingdom, though, and I don't think it has the same significance for cats as for humans.

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  12. You mean nobody has to buy dinner?

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  13. You will have to translate in to guinea pig latin.

    I had to post it. It is a gift, and a curse.

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